Ok so this week for my weekly post I thought I'd write about how CRAZY and BEAUTIFUL life can be all at the same time.... I've been really REALLY struggling lately ( I feel like I say that a lot) but the last couple months have just been rough..I feel like such an inadequate mother.. My kids deserve the kind of mother that I read about in every one elses blogs! You know the kind of mother who playes fun games with her children all the time, the kind of mother who always kisses there owies better, the kind of mother who makes huge healthy meals every night, the kind of mother who is ALWAYS patient and never loses her cool, the kind of mother who DOESNT put her kids infront of a tv for hours on end.. you know that kind of MOM!!! Most days THATS NOT ME, sooo on top of me feeling super inadequate and down, Pipa has been teething (BOOOO) and she just got her first ear infection this week, Briyler is in FULL FORCE TERRIBLE 3's (its awful), Dugi must be feeling neglected because he cries at my feet all day long wanting to be held and poor Ryker has been struggling with his "dad" aka Rick, not showing up for visitation.. It really effects him and I hate how much disappointment he has had to handle this early on in life!.... in short...... I am just feeling BAD!!
BUT.............. (now that I've bored you with all of my weekly problems) can I just say, HOW BEAUTIFUL MY LIFE IS at the same time!!! In spite of all of the struggles, that sometimes feel like to much... I am sooo very grateful for the many tender mercies Heavenly Father shows me on a weekly basis.
*I am loving watching Briyler and Ryker play lately. They seem to be forming a brotherly bond that makes me OHH SOO HAPPY.. they truly are best friends and they walk around the house all day long saying "love you buddy", " love you too little buddy"!! SOO CUTE!!
*on top of Pipa feeling under the weather she is still sooo smiley.. She is starting to laugh and hearing that just makes my heart MELT!!... (for the most part she is still sleeping through the night, DEFINITELY A TENDER MERCY)
*and Ohh my little Dugi!! What to say about him, he is starting to try to fit in with the older boys. He follows them around the house trying to be like them, he thinks they are the best things ever!! Right now he is testing the waters and trying to figure out what his roll is going to be. The boys love him but he's still a little small to play all the rough games the older boys love to play...So when he's not following his brothers around, he loves to dance, smile, eat and play with mommy and pipa:) :) .. I Love that he is such a happy little boy!! and I love watching him grow!
*my husband making 3 batches of caramel popcorn, SOOO YUMMY!! (and yes popcorn was a tender mercy for me this week)
I think the highlight of the week FOR ME was game night with some super fun friends!! I loved having the adult interaction (a friendly game of phase 10).. I am still SOO surprised at how well our kids get along. They also have 4 beautiful children, 3 girls and 1 boy:) the 2 older kids are girls, that's who Ryker and Briyler normally play with, and can I just say how cute they all are together!! They were laughing and dancing upstairs. Briyler was wearing tinkerbell sun glasses and playing a pink guitar, HILARIOUS!! Ryker was on cloud 9 telling all the girls what to do... OOOHHH and As we were playing phase 10, we hear " I WANT TO MARRY YOU!!) said from one of the cute little girls to Ryker... Ryker totally blushed and ran away.. and then of course we embarrassed both of them by pointing it out:O) But it was seriously sooo cute!! (My boys never talk about marriage, I cant wait to hear the funny girly things Pipa is going to say) ........They hardly got in trouble or misbehaved the whole night.. Don't get me wrong it was a crazy, and loud, and chaotic, and almost circus like.... but what do you expect when you have 8 kids all under 7... ( I think there oldest is 7) .... For some reason it just works when our 2 families get together... I love seeing them ALL soo happy!!!
I think I might venture out to say that the highlight for my HUBBY this week was the GIANTS WINNING THE SUPERBOWL!!! Kaj is actually a HUGE COLTS fan but since they had an awful year, he thought it would be nice to show Peyton's younger brother Eli some LOVE:) We had an awesome time at the Bauers house, lots of food, friends, and FUN!!! Perfect end to our week!
WELL..... I gotta get my FHE plans ready for tomorrow.. :) Hope everyone has a wonderful week!!! **speaking of next week, I hope I make it out alive!! Dad is going on his 1st business trip which means mom is home alone with 4 kids ALL BY HERSELF for 3 days, then a week later he is leaving for ANOTHER 4 DAYS!! EEEK I am hoping I make it through this month!!!!!!!!
*There is JOY IN THE JOURNEY, I think I might be listening to that song alot this week... its one of my favorites!!
Nikki,
ReplyDeleteYou can't look at other peoples blogs and compare you life to them. I know many of women who hide all of the bad stuff on there blogs. I always try and list the good, the bad and the ugly on my blog. I think you are an amazing mother. You are mothering 4 children and one in your tummy. I can barely handle my 2 and the thought of my third one is overwhelming. So I admire you! Your kids will always have best friends to play with.....and they will remember all the crazy things they do as kids. My Mom had 5 kids in 6 years and then another one 4 years later. We have so many great memories. I don't ever remember caring if the house was messy or clean. And I don't remember my mom sitting down and playing with us, we had each other. She would read to us and feed us and help with homework but thats all that really mattered. And now she would go back to that life in a heart beat if she could maybe just for a week, but she misses the crazyness of it all. So enjoy! I am glad you have noticed tender mercies. I am constantly reminding myself that we have things happen for a certain reason, and the Lord has a magnificent plan for all of us! You are a wonderful MOTHER! So keep your head up, you must be doing something right because he keeps sending all these little ones to you! :)
Call me if you ever need anything!
Collette
You are so amazing Nikki! And I think that was the highlight of our week too :) I agree with Collette, blogs certainly aren't the whole story...but it is hard to not compare, I am definitely guilty of that too! You are a wonderful mother, you can tell be being around you for 5 minutes that you LOVE your little family with all your heart. Thanks for being our friends, can't wait to hang out again soon!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Ladies!! You are both soo sweet, and dont think reading your comments THIS morning was an accident:) I'm sooo lucky to have such GREAT FRIENDS!! Tonii we definitely need to get together again soon, we all LOVE your family!!!
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